Another post from the baby blog, written October 5, 2009.

Baby,

The first trimester has come and gone, and I’m a survivor, although I didn’t really survive much when I look back on the way I’ve felt the past several months. I experienced a 72 hour period of extreme nausea which had me terrified I would have to suffer for several more months in this manner, but after a trip to the health food store and a pantry stocked with ginger beer (packed with 26g of ginger!), ginger ale, ginger tea, ginger cookies, and ginger candies, I’ve been able to stave off any nausea that threatened to appear once again. Placebo effect? I’m still not sure, but when you feel like your stomach is going to be ripped violently through your throat you don’t care what works, or why, as long as it does.

Other symptoms I experienced included fatigue (sometimes I sleep close to 15 hours/day), an aversion to really strong tastes, and low libido. I use the word libido in hopes that you won’t actually know what I am talking about until you are old enough to not be grossed out, and in fact, appreciate how your mom and dad suffered in order to bring you into existence. :)

My biggest stress has been weight gain. You’ll see the photos of me back in college someday and understand why I worry so much about this. My body likes to gain weight, and will do so at the earliest convenience. I don’t want gestational diabetes, I don’t want to feel heavy in my own skin, I don’t want you to be overweight, I don’t want to do things to you know that might predispose you to gain weight like I, and the women in my family, do. Of course you have a 50% chance of getting your dad’s hairy chicken legs and the rest of the skinny genes that run of his family so maybe I don’t need to stress about it too much.

By now we’ve decided on a midwife attended home birth, even though I don’t have a midwife yet. Actually I don’t have a midwife, doctor, or doula. If you didn’t know I tend to be lazy about getting health care issues taken care of (remember that one time I suffered with back pain for a year and a half, and debilitating sciatica for almost 6 months?) but this time I believe it’s a combination of laziness and the belief that I’m not actually sick. I don’t need to go to a doctor and get “fixed” for my condition. I take my vitamins, am very conscious of what I eat (I hope we are still eating the Real Food Diet when you are growing up because it is a ridiculously pleasurable way of life) and think daily about how I should go for a walk or a bike ride or go lift some weights. I do need to find a care provider for the birth at some point though, as I’m guessing your father doesn’t want to take on the task of bringing his first child into the world to fall on his shoulders alone.

At this point all I really want is to hear your heartbeat with the doppler, something I’m not sure I need to pay X amount of dollars for. I know you’re there, I’m actually just worried there is more than one of you in there. Is this something all new mothers worry about? Not that two of you wouldn’t be twice as nice, but I have all of these plans and you know how I like to plan things.

You’re quite well known to the public by now, with most people coming up to me to say “Congrats! I read about your big news on your blog/Facebook/Twitter.” I wish you could tell me right now how you are going to feel about having your entire life documented so publicly. Will you cherish the record, or come to despise it? Please speak up now, or forever hold your peace.

Baby, most of all, we want you to know how much we love you. And that we’re glad you stuck around with us so far. We’re going to take good care of you, teach you some hard lessons, and smother you with love. Thanks for being the first of what we hope will turn into many spirits to volunteer to come down and be shepherded through life with us. We love you so much.

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