Yesterday Ashley posted this comment on my post about getting my MRI:
I think it’s so wonderful how you don’t feel self-conscious posting pictures of yourself on here! If my face looked like that, I’d probably put a bag over my head and never go out, but you just smile anyways! Bless your heart!
I’d like to discuss two things.
1. How do you deal with rude commenters? (Both emotionally and publicly?)
2. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor? (Because it’s best to focus on the positive when surrounded by so much negativity!)
If only Ashley actually had some guts to reveal who she actually is! But trolls usually like to live in dark places all alone under a bridge so I think that’s where she is going to stay for now.
Oh, and this is the comment she left for me on this post on Weddingbee:
I think it’s funny how the photo you put before the cut, and the one that you want to hang on your wall, doesn’t show your husband’s face at all, only his back, but shows you. It says a lot about you as a person, and probably a lot about how your marriage is going to go.
Don’t worry Ashley, I’ll keep publishing your comments as long as you keep leaving them. It’s always nice to make new friends!
P.S.-IP Address tracking tells me Ashley lives in Boston. Hope it’s not too cold up there for you Ash!
March 21st, 2009 on 12:09 am
How ridiculously rude! But I love your attitude - you’re a lot more mature than I am.
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March 21st, 2009 on 12:39 am
Gosh just put a bag over your face Jenna!! Since it obviously is so repulsive. Oh my gosh I really hope this “Ashley” keeps posting. And I wish you could figure out who it was, and then see what she looks like. (obviously she thinks she is pretty hott)
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March 21st, 2009 on 1:30 am
Well, isn’t she just a gem. I’m currently picturing the Fremont Troll as our dear friend Ashley.
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March 21st, 2009 on 1:57 am
Jenna,
Two things:
1. You are gorgeous, and we all know you love your hubby. It is obvious you two are really happy together. Thanks for sharing your daily happenings with us, I am now officially addicted to your recipes
2. This one is more for Ashley. Classy, hun. REAL classy. Keep your backhanded compliments, if you could even call them that, to *yourself*. Didn’t your mommy ever tell you if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all? Grow a backbone and try giving a compliment, it makes the world a better place.
p.s. Jenna, saw your photo blog, it is wonderful! Keep up the great work!
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March 21st, 2009 on 3:03 am
Maybe instead of putting a paper bag over her head she should shove one in her mouth to stop her saying anything else!
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March 21st, 2009 on 3:11 am
Whatevs, you know she’s just jealous. You’re awesome and open and out there. Keep it up!
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March 21st, 2009 on 4:01 am
I think it’s so funny how they have this fake sweet tone to them! Haha. I also love the way you’re dealing with it!
In absolute honesty, I think you always look good in the photos you post. As for your choosing that photo, so boohoo, you like a good PHOTO, and that one happened not to show TH’s face. All Asley’s photos are obviously the fake cheesy posed type, smiling into the camera and nothing else, so she doesn’t get art.
oh and my favourite icecream is Fudgy Coconut Macaroon from Baskin & Robbins, if they still make it - haven’t had it since 2003.
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Jenna Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 11:46 am
Did you see TH’s reply to her WB comment? It’s absolutely hilarious.
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Ruby Slippers Reply:
March 22nd, 2009 at 11:35 am
I did now! Beautifully said! No wonder you love him so. What a gentleman.
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Cate Subrosa Reply:
March 24th, 2009 at 12:05 pm
He he, Suavocado hit back in style! Very funny, Mr Avo
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March 21st, 2009 on 6:46 am
What a troll. I will never understand why people who have nonconstructive, irrelevant things to say decide to post on other people’s blogs. Keep posting her responses - we’ll see how she likes being put out there.
As a sidenote, Jenna, did you see what “Mr. Avocado” wrote in response to Ashley on your WeddingBee post? I put it in quotes, just in case its not your hubs. If it is your hubs, its further proof that he’s an awesome guy and you’re a blessed girl. How could you not love a guy like that?
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Jenna Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 11:47 am
It was him
As soon as I read him the comment he said “Can I go on WB and reply?”
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March 21st, 2009 on 7:09 am
I love how That Husband defended you on each one. So sweet!
Jenna, you’re fabulous and she sucks. The end.
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March 21st, 2009 on 7:19 am
I’m sorry you’ve got a rude person commenting on your blogs. I’m always surprised when it comes out of no where, and always to the nicest people.
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March 21st, 2009 on 7:43 am
I admire you for calling her out. I usually just delete rude comments but I think you’ve got a better plan.
Also, now I have ice cream on the brain. I’m thinking dark chocolate and mint chocolate chip.
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March 21st, 2009 on 7:48 am
Ah trolls, sadly I’ve seen and been on the brunt side of a few. It usually means two things, one they wish they were as cool as you but aren’t, and two they honestly think they are funny when they clearly aren’t.
They’re the type of people to stand there and say things like “Oh man I am so witty, watch me trip this old lady. Heelarious.”
I’m sorry you’ve been on the brunt side of this. But treating them just as they are, pathetic aspects of humanity that are a product of the complete anonymous side of the internet, she’ll probably get bored and move on.
Oh and when they don’t have Thin Mint ice cream I adore Ben & Jerry’s Phish food. That stuff should be illegal.
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March 21st, 2009 on 8:16 am
I think you have the best approach to dealing with them — calling them out. Generally, I think “trolls” just like to make people feel bad about themselves while making themselves feel superior. But by posting her comments here and racking up all the love and support from everyone else, it just makes her look wrong, out of place, and nasty — not remotely superior in the last.
Please. Regardless of what you DID look like — even if you honestly did look like you needed to wear a bag over your head every time you left the house (which obviously, you do not) — I would still be faithfully reading every day — because of your sparkling personality. That is what matters anyway, and clearly what Ashley is lacking.
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March 21st, 2009 on 8:18 am
That Husband is tops on my list. YEAH!! How to deal…addressing it in a way to let them know that THEY are the idiot, not you…and then ignore them. All they want is your time and energy and you are too beautiful and wonderful to waste it on them.
& Mint Chocolate Chip rocks my world. Also, just plain Chocolate. Mmm.
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March 21st, 2009 on 8:21 am
Hahaha, I just went back and read TH’s response on the Weddingbee post — Jenna, you found yourself one super-witty man. I love it!
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Jenna Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 11:48 am
I don’t think I realized he was that witty until now! I’m still laughing about the “If they like a picture with half your face they don’t like you half as much” line!
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March 21st, 2009 on 8:29 am
Wow. I don’t even have words for that! Which is funny since I’m going to leave a comment anyway. I do appreciate that they’re passive aggressive comments at their finest. Passive aggressive people are fascinating to me.
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March 21st, 2009 on 8:36 am
SInce we’re being positive I’m not going to feed trolls any negative energy - they heart it. But favorite ice cream is fun! Mine is Ciao Bella gelato in mint chocolate chip. It’s such delicious real mint flavor. I’ve only had it once but I dream of having it again….
You didn’t say what your favorite ice cream flavor was!
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Jenna Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 11:49 am
You are so right! I’m actually a gelato fan, specifically sour cherry gelato. It’s my absolute favorite.
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March 21st, 2009 on 8:44 am
wow she has some nerve. in no way should you cover up your face! you’re beautiful and I’m proud of you for thinking about ice cream after that!
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March 21st, 2009 on 9:19 am
You know, maybe she’s just not good at finding the right words:
“If my face looked like that, I’d probably put a bag over my head and never go out,” could actually mean: “Sister, you’re embarrassing the rest of us… who looks that good in blue pants? Not fair.”
OK, I doubt it.
I’m digging your attitude, and I want to give TH a hug for his awesome responses. No wonder Ashley’s jealous of a cute couple who make such a great team. Poor dear.
Also: I love any ice cream that is served with cake.
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March 21st, 2009 on 9:32 am
When I saw that comment I thought it must be some kind of joke from a friend or something. I don’t know why someone would write that.
Ice cream- Do you know yet the joy that is Blue Bell ice cream? Mint chocolate chip and Moollennium Crunch. Which reminds me I have some in the freezer. Is it bad to eat ice cream for breakfast?
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March 21st, 2009 on 9:52 am
Seriously? Is this girl for real? Jenna, you are beautiful and we all love reading about your sweet marriage. You have a wonderful TH who clearly stands up for his Bride - love it!
Looks like our friend Ashley needs to find a new hobby other than being a blog creeper.
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March 21st, 2009 on 9:55 am
Mint chocolate chip seems to be a favorite - and for good reason! A close second is Hagen Das rocky road, however I must stay away for fear of eating the entire container.
Don’t let her get to you! You’re beautiful inside and out!
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March 21st, 2009 on 10:11 am
Wow. Seriously. W-O-W.
My favorite ice cream is pepprmint bon-bon because it’s more fun to say than “mint chocolate chip”.
Keep your (gorgeous) chin up, and kill ‘em with kindness,girl!
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March 21st, 2009 on 10:26 am
Congrats! The fact that you’re getting comments from people like this shows that your blog must be impressive enough to make “her” (who knows if it is even a woman?) think that it is worth her time.
I think that it is usually best to just delete the comments, unless they serve a purpose (as in this case for your post).
As for ice cream… it depends upon my mood, but either coffee** or peace frozen yogurt (must be fro yo, the peace ice cream isn’t as good with more calories and fat!).
**What is your stance on Mormons eating coffee ice cream? The ones I encountered felt embarrassed about it, but from previous discussions on you blog it seems that it might not violate your standards.
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Jenna Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 11:51 am
I don’t think that eating coffee ice cream is breaking the WOW, but I avoid it because I want to avoid coming to like the taste of coffee, you know what I mean? It’s like non-alcoholic beer. It’s not beer that’s the problem for me, it’s the alcohol. But I’m not going to go around drinking non-alcoholic beer because that means I am only one tiny step away from drinking the real stuff.
So I figure if I stay away from coffee flavored products and coffee flavored ice cream I won’t grow to love them and then I won’t ever be tempted to go to Starbucks and get myself a latte.
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R Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 4:09 pm
That makes a lot of sense. Kudos to you for avoiding temptation! Ironically enough though, I don’t like coffee.
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March 21st, 2009 on 10:28 am
Unfortunately there these people out there who are just angry and can never be happy at the fact that someone else is. You’re a strong person.
PS. My favorite ice cream is chocolate with cookie dough.
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March 21st, 2009 on 12:16 pm
I just saw a commercial today for McGruff the crime dog taking a bite out of cyber-bullying. haha. No joke. I instantly thought it was just great. Why anyone would want or choose to take the time to cyber-bully anyone is preposterous. I think when people actually spend their time reading your blog and then coming up with nasty responses and taking the time to post them, they are obviously/clearly sad, bored/boring, lonely, pathetic people with nothing better to do…
With regard to your questions, I have not yet received a nasty comment on my blog, but I would probably just delete them and not worry about it. Again, obviously sad, pathetic, lonely, boring people…and like McGruff the crime dog told me this morning: Don’t forward it, don’t copy it, don’t reply to it…just delete it and move on. “That’ll ruffle their feathers,” he says. I love this post and think you’re welcome to handle it how you wish, but I probably wouldn’t handle it this way myself b/c I think you’re giving her too much attention & satisfaction, IMO.
And my favorite ice cream is probably Ben & Jerry’s cookie dough or any other brand Cookies & Cream.
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March 21st, 2009 on 1:23 pm
Just keep doing what you do Jenna. I’m sad to see that this troll is from Boston - it’s very UN-Bostonlike behavior. Trolls like Ashley just want attention and validation. I would just delete the negative comments so this person can’t attract any more drama to satisfy their unfulfilled life.
I like mint oreo ice cream.
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March 21st, 2009 on 1:45 pm
I’m sorry about the negative comments. Isn’t it amazing how one person’s comments can bring you down? Glad to see you aren’t letting it rain on your parade!
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March 21st, 2009 on 1:46 pm
I am sorry that there are people out there like this! I love your blogs and who you show yourself to be on your blogs. I think you are very nice and very beautiful! Keep up the amazing blogging!
I love Choc. Chip Cookie Dough. Even though I pick out all the cookie dough and eat it first!
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March 21st, 2009 on 2:39 pm
Wait, didn’t you know you can say whatever you want, no matter how rude or offensive, as long as you follow it up with “Bless your heart?” It’s pretty much the greatest linguistic invention ever.
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Jenna Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 2:40 pm
Yeah yeah!
Like that phrase “I don’t mean to be rude”
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Liesl Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 8:08 pm
Or perhaps “I’m just saying.”
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March 21st, 2009 on 3:37 pm
you know you’ve made it when you start to get haters.
i had someone tell me that I was not cute nor pretty, not stylish nor trendy, but she liked my pictures. um thanks for the compliment? haha, the trolls are really into passive aggressive compliments.
i just ignore and then move on. i get my fair share of nice comments that I can’t complain about the one odd person that likes to write mean things.
and my favorite ice cream flavor is cookies and cream. yum!
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March 21st, 2009 on 5:01 pm
I’d just ignore them - the more attention you bring to them, the happier they get. You could always really stun them by telling them that you’re praying for them.
My favourite flavour of ice cream? Probably this chocolate mouse/nougat gelato in Crete. I could happily get fat on that stuff. SO good!
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March 21st, 2009 on 5:14 pm
Ashamed to share a name. Isn’t it sad when the comments people leave are angry ones. Honestly if she doesn’t like you that much why does she waste her time following what you are doing and thinking through your blog. Maybe if she had a life of her own she wouldn’t be so miserable.
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March 21st, 2009 on 5:54 pm
You know, I think you’re awesome for not deleting the comment. I do think this troll is probably ecstatic to get a whole post dedicated to him/her and we should just ignore him/her from now on, but I admire your thick skin.
And duuuuude, mint chocolate chip is my absolute fave.
Unrelated: have you ever tasted coffee or alcohol? I know your family reads your blog, so maybe you don’t want to answer, but I was wondering if you ever went through a rebellious phase or if there were ever temptations, etc.
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Jenna Reply:
March 21st, 2009 at 7:26 pm
Even if I was going to answer yes (which obviously I’m not) I would still talk about it because I think there are some things you repent of and keep to yourself, and there are other things that you can admit to and talk about and do some good with, you know?
I have officially had one sip of alcohol in my life, it’s when my friends and I went to Cabo and we ordered poolside drinks and the Pina Colada came with alcohol in it (even though we had been crazy specific about no alcohol. In my opinion alcohol totally ruins delicious fruity drinks.
I have never tasted coffee. And it doesn’t appeal to me, because apparently it doesn’t taste good unless you put lots of sugar in it. I would rather have a really cold glass of milk instead
I did go through a rebellious stage, but it was centered more on making out with older boys in the back seat of their car than partying.
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March 21st, 2009 on 6:48 pm
Boo for trolls. You know, I’ve met you in real life and you are fabulous. I love reading about your life. Yeah, I like a picture featuring the bride on her wedding day. Of course, this probably says a lot about me and my marriage. Ha!
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March 21st, 2009 on 6:51 pm
Oooh drama.. loves it. I think you’re adorable, and not in the patronizing way. I just followed you here from WB because I love your matter-of-fact take on things. As far as ice cream goes, I catch a lot of heat for this, but here goes.. my favorite is vanilla. Yep, I’m giving a shoutout to the standard - why isn’t there more vanilla love?
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March 21st, 2009 on 7:02 pm
She didn’t even use bless your heart correctly. I’m awfully sorry that she did that. I don’t understand why or how people are able to be intentionally mean. She must be very, very unhappy in her own life to say something like that to someone that she doesn’t even know, especially when that someone is such a positive, open person. It makes me sad for her. I love your blog and really appreciate you sharing what you do with us. Plus I think that you are very pretty.
And my favourite ice cream flavour is horchata.
PS. I read your hub’s response over on the Bee and think that he’s just a stand up guy. Good for the both of you
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March 21st, 2009 on 7:05 pm
I’ve been following your blog for while and I’m not much of a commenter, more of a blog stalker (okay, that sounds a bit wierd, but you know what I mean). I just wanted to say, that I love the attitude you have about this. Most people would be upset and let it get them down, but it truly speaks of your character making this in to a funny.
My favorite ice cream is Laloo’s Goat Milk Strawberry Darling Ice Cream or any sorbet flavor. I’m allergic to cow’s milk and this stuff is crazy expensive so I don’t get it very often, so its a real treat when I get to splurge.
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March 21st, 2009 on 7:40 pm
jenna,
you win a billion (more) cool points for posting this.
i love it.
i love your response to unkindness. and i love TH’s as well!
can i just say that although it breaks my heart that some people would even think of negetive things to say as “Ashley” did, it makes me smile…MAJORLY…to be reading your post and everyone’s comments.
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March 21st, 2009 on 10:16 pm
Wow. She’s a gem. I LOVE that people think that it is their job to inform you how awful they think you are. I’ve just recently run across this in my own blog and I’ve decided I’m definetely going to post the comments but I’m going to respond too. Someone will always find a reason to put you down. I chalk it up to how fabulous they think my life is!
And as for ice cream I’ll take anything with peanut butter and chocolate!
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March 21st, 2009 on 11:35 pm
Jenna, your husband adores you. I love his replies.
And, you are BEAUTIFUL! (seriously)
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March 22nd, 2009 on 12:42 am
Wow - our Ashley, she’s special.
Jenna, you are lovely! I love how much you share with us, and how open you are about your life. It’s refreshing. That someone anyone criticizes that … they just need their own reality check.
Ice Cream? I love chocolate chip cookie dough.
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March 22nd, 2009 on 8:54 am
bahahaha it’s nice of ashley to keep track of you in your various corners of the internet! it seems to me that even people who don’t like you can’t resist your beautiful blog
and… chocolate.
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March 22nd, 2009 on 9:33 am
Ridiculous….It actually took me a couple of times reading that before I realized she was insulting you…my brain was not computing that someone could be that rude to you! I’m glad she has so much time on her hands to sit at home and think of snarky comments to post on strangers blogs…pathetic.
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March 22nd, 2009 on 9:35 am
WOOOOW! I can’t believe someone would go through that much trouble to insult you. I feel sorry for them. And good for you for making a post about it and calling them out. If they’re going to make such rude comments in a public way then they should be called out.
Also, I love Cookie dough, Mint Chocolate Chip, or Butterfinger. They’re all amazing!
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March 22nd, 2009 on 11:43 am
TH comment is awesome. I love wittyness (that’s probably not a word though).
How to deal with it. I think you just have to remember that people only know what you share with them of your life. They don’t know you in person and therefore have no right to spit venom out of their mouth.
You just have to brush it off. What matters is what the people who know you and surround you tell about it. Your sister, your husband they know the real you and if they had any problem with your attitude our though you could do better, they would have told you already.
Publicly, to be honest I never received one. But I would either comment under it or simply delete it.
In this case, I feel sorry for that person he/she does not have your self-confidence and honesty. It’s a shame, those are good things to have in your life.
Ice cream? Ben and Jerry’s Cinnamon Buns without a doubt. I’m a huge cinnamon lover.
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March 22nd, 2009 on 7:05 pm
WOW. I can’t believe her. I’m from Boston too, maybe her icy-ness is what made it flurry in MARCH today?
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March 22nd, 2009 on 7:14 pm
Hahahaha. I love this. I leave the snarky mean comments up too, in hopes that their mean words will haunt them and perhaps one day they will feel bad enough about it to take it down themselves. (At least on facebook you can delete your own comments, I dunno about blogs? Probably not…)
I love your reply up there about rebelling by making out with older boys. HAHAHA.. that’s hilarious. Oh and I also love that TH posted replies defending your honor. So sweet!
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March 22nd, 2009 on 8:27 pm
I tend to think it is better to ignore those are negative than to prompt public outlash towards them. That is just my opinion though, and it is nice to see you have so many friends.
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March 22nd, 2009 on 9:43 pm
Wow, Wow, Wow. I have been dealing with people like this lately, and I firmly believe that the happier you are the more content you are with your life, the more people try and bring you down with insulting comments. I know it’s cliche to say that Ashley is hating her life, but it’s so true.
Then there are those people who are just mean, and spend their days on the internet being ugly with their words. Who knows what do with those people!
However, I have had people say things to me via blog that I have made me burst into tears, and then I swear that I am going to stop blogging…but that never happens.
You are a beautiful person inside and out, and my friend Dawn says that you are pretty without make up, how many women can say that?
Oh, and ice cream, I am allergic, but I can eat those tofuti ice cream bars like they are M&M’s
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March 23rd, 2009 on 12:25 am
I just have to comment on this one
Down with trolls. Doesn’t she have anything better to do?! Oh Ashley sweetie, get a boyfriend, or at least get off your computer once in a while.
And secondly. I’ve known you for over five years and you’ve ALWAYS been beautiful Jenna! Just wanted to reitterated that the world would be missing out a bunch if you went around with a bag on your head.
love you! Em
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March 23rd, 2009 on 9:26 am
I know things like this are hurtful and you don’t deserve to be treated like that. But by publicly humiliating her and talking badly behind her back we have stooped to her level or lower? And if we act this way we are only showing the people around us [Ashley, Friends, Family, Childern] that this is an acceptable way to treat or fellow humans. Shouldn’t we be good neighbors turn the other cheek and pray for her?
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March 23rd, 2009 on 9:50 am
Jenna — let’s be honest. Most of the blogging/bridal word adores you. The chick does, to the point where my fiance thinks that you and I actually know each other/I was at your wedding, because of the frequency with with I talk about your covetable nuptuals and your awesome wife blog.
You clearly don’t need any more support but I just wanted to let you know that you are hot, awesome, and clearly, most people want to emulate you. Being rude via blog comments are the only way that homeslice can think to ruin your shine, but you’re not letting it happen. Stay classy
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March 23rd, 2009 on 11:38 am
The first thing that popped into my mind upon reading the MRI post was, “No bra? Really? Lucky girl!” Haha. If it’s a bit too crass to be commenting on your boobs, my apologies.
I hope that Ashley continues to comment on our page. If nothing else it gives me a chuckle when I’m having a bad day.
I’m sure you’re not taking any of this to heart. I hope you can laugh about it.
But I know that after a long day, something like that can put you over the edge.
Oh, I have several favorite ice cream flavors. I like the “weird” ones with fruit and nuts in them. I used to work in an ice cream parlor and there is very little I will say no to.
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March 23rd, 2009 on 12:00 pm
TH comment is awesome! Props to you and TH
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March 23rd, 2009 on 12:49 pm
My guess is Ashley has been stalking TH for years and is totally peeved that you won him over. Am I right??
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March 23rd, 2009 on 3:01 pm
“Ashley” visits my blog about three times a month. I now block her IP address so her comments get automatically directed to spam!
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March 23rd, 2009 on 8:32 pm
Jenna-your awsome and so is TH! I’ve been following you on weddingbee and have recently bookmarked That Wife. You’re beautiful and even more, you’ve got a great attitude. Glad to see your not letting rude people get to you. She’s just a bitter, lonely person looking for someone to pick on.
As for my favorite ice cream-cookies and cream!
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March 23rd, 2009 on 8:44 pm
Wow, I can’t believe someone can be so rude.
Obviously you’re gorgeous (I’m not the first to say so!) and the fact she would say that about anyone, and you in particular blows my mind. I love DH’s response to the weddingbee post
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March 24th, 2009 on 4:06 am
Blogging really does put you in a place to get both positive and negative feedback, doesn’t it! I’m glad you have the sense of self to shake it off, and a husband who can help on the days when it feels overwhelming. That’s awesome.
Those comments were rude and very passive aggressive….
…but (and I hope this doesn’t feel unkind) isn’t this blog post too?
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March 24th, 2009 on 11:32 am
I think Ashley is your troll and stalker! Add “how do you handle negative feedback” to the list of questions I had for you… I guess her obsession with you must be positive. But, strangely, I’ve chosen pictures from my wedding that I love without really noticing that they feature me and not the hubs, and people have questioned (jokingly) if I am in love with my own image…but I am in love with a really, really good picture!
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March 24th, 2009 on 12:02 pm
Oh Jenna, I don’t come by for a couple of days and you’ve gone and got yourself a pet troll?! Well, congratulations!
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March 24th, 2009 on 12:26 pm
I saw this on another website, I wanted to share:
http://bestweddingblogs.com/blog_defamation.html
I think you should get that t-shirt. ;o)
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