20 May
My Discectomy
The night before the surgery I was up late, a product of my nervousness and screwed up sleep schedule. I wasn’t actually nervous about the surgery, just the needle they would put in my hand for the IV.
Gotta get my last minute blogging done!
No contacts, no glasses, no jewelry, no makeup, no valuables, my crocs, and my Enders game/Dashboard Confessional sweatsuit.
That Husband took the day off (well, maybe he “worked from home” I’m still not sure). I told him he had to be there in case I died. I knew I wouldn’t actually die, and he knew that too, but it’s always a possibility when you have surgery, you know? I’m a fan of facing reality head on.
All smiles, even with that nasty IV in my arm. I think it’s because I might have been thinking that going braless, in a backless hospital gown, with no makeup and a green cap on my head was a good look for me. What say you?
Right before they wheeled me away, the Dr. came in to talk to us and answer any last minute questions. Too bad he didn’t realize that it would be a 15 minute visit with That Mom around. I really liked his answer for what he expected to find when he opened me up and looked at the disc. He asked if we had ever seen a tire run so bald that the outer lining had cracked and the inner tube was poking through. He was going to open up my back, move aside some ligament and bone, and snip off that “inner tube” poking out, and then stitch things up as best he could. As had been explained to me many times before a Discectomy is not performed to “fix” the bad disc, just to alleviate the pain I was having due to the “inner tube” pushing on my nerve.
The operation went well (as far as I know) and when I got back I was apparently in a contemplative mood. What could I have been considering…
But look how well I was doing just moments after awaking from the anesthesia.
Oh wait, maybe not that well.
Man, this picture makes me laugh out loud every time I look at it.
This one too. I must have lain funny on my cheek causing it to feel a little bit swollen. Pointing this out was of the utmost importance.
And one more. Good thing that hot guy sitting across from me was already stuck with me or he may have been reconsidering things at this point.
Once I stopped scratching and slobbering it was time for the pain chart. If you would like to read a heee-lareeous story about the pain chart, head over to my friend Darci’s blog.
Awww look at that lower lip poking out. This was a tough choice for me! I went with a 7.
What was the first thing I asked for? A kiss from my husband? A drink of water? Nope, the crackberry. I sent my first post-surgery tweet as soon as I could type one out.
Clothes on, crackberry in hand, smile on face, juice in belly. I think it’s time to scram!
In my first post back after the surgery I hinted that the diagnosis post-surgery was even worse than the news before. TH and TM filled me in on what the Dr. told them while I was drooling in the recovery room. Remember the inner tube poking out of a tiny crack? Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha. I go big or go home my friends. Who needs a crack when you can have an entire broken back wall? That’s right my friends, I basically have a big doggie door of a back wall, allowing the inner tube to squeeze on out.
For right now, things seem to be A-Ok. The leg pain that drove me to have the surgery hasn’t made an appearance yet (the surgery doesn’t come with any kind of guarantee that a positive result will be seen so I’ve been wary), and I’m hoping that the back pain I’m feeling now will go away in a week or two.
Unfortunately the doggie door diagnosis has larger implications for the future. The chances of me avoiding another surgery in the future seem slim, and the next one will involve removing the disc completely and fusing the spine. We pray that this doesn’t happen, but it’s a distinct possibility. I have a nasty, old, broken disc.
I left the hospital with a diaper patch on my lower back for a whole week. It was only after the week was over that I learned it was unnecessary to wear it for so long. I didn’t mind so much since it gave me an excuse to only shower two times in seven days. That’s a record even for me!
When I did shower I wore this fun little Aqua Guard. Aren’t these a genius idea? It had adhesive around the edges that didn’t sting when it was taken off. Those are the kind of scientific breakthroughs I can appreciate.
I wanted to show you a really nasty photo of my scar, but this is the best I can do. Is this gross? Should I have hidden this behind another photo? I didn’t think it was that bad.
Isn’t that tape induced border sweet?
I apologize to those of you who may have been overwhelmed or grossed out by this photo. It won’t happen again until the next back surgery. Or until I have children.
For the first week I was told to lift nothing more than 8 lbs, sit for no longer than 10 minutes at a time, and generally avoid anythin that made me say “ouch”. I was up on my feet within a few days, but only for about an hour each day. A week later my back feels sore when I sit for too long, stand for too long, or lay down for too long. I’m hoping this goes away soon.
I’m glad it’s over.
Also:
I'm a farm-raised almost-crunchy stroller-pushing picture-taking lifestyle-blog-writing gastronomy-obsessed divine-seeking thrift-store-combing cheese-inhaling pavement-pounding laughter-sprinkling lover of individuality and taking chances.
I love the pictures of drugged up Jenna. My favorite is definitely the protruding lip while looking at the pain chart. Funny.
1Oh, you poor thing! I’m sorry to hear that the prognosis was suckier than you hoped. I hope that your specialists can come up with a solution.
I am actually in awe of your ability not to shower. I cannot do it, I cry when I have to skip a shower. After surgery last year I sacrificed my dignity in order to variously have my boyfriend and mother help me shower. I too became a massive fan of aqua guards over my giant tummy scar.
2Glad you are feeling well!
3That’s such a tiny incision! Isn’t it amazing what science can do these days?
Glad you’re starting to feel better!
4thanks for sharing your story with us. i’m glad you’re doing better now and hopefully you have a speedy recovery (including the pain too!)
5Okay the drug pictures are so funny. Sorry for laughing but they are. Your surgery boo boo doesn’t look bad at all. But I am use to nasty things. My hysterectomy cut was nasty and I cried so hard when I first saw it. UGH. So that looks great. I am sorry about your disc being broke that is no fun. But hopefully you will be pain free. And I so glad you are doing better too..
6Wow. I am glad you’re up and about and hope the healing process goes well.
7I’m glad you’re ok! Thanks for sharing the drugged up shots with us. I love how ready you guys always are with a camera!
And the wound/scar shot doesn’t gross me out.
8Here’s to pain free days ahead! The cracked out on pain meds pictures are fabulous
9These photos are hilarious and thanks for sharing them, I needed the chuckle!
10Not that I got a kick out of your misery…but this sure was fun to read and your humor about it lifted my spirits this morning! Can’t believe all that you’ve been through to get out of pain - I hope you continue to recover well. Thanks for the letting us experience this with you!
11Ooooh, tropical vacation
I saw your tweet about it. I’m jealous already! I really want to go back soon!
12That scar picture is not even remotely gross! However, I may be jaded. I’ve seen things that make me want to puke at work.
13Haha, I totally copied that pain chart from Darcy’s blog to keep. I can never remember which numbers mean what. The scar is not bad at all. I do love the border around it though. It would make for a really pretty frame.
14Hahaha!
15Well the good news is that you’re feeling better. :oD
I am continuously amazed at modern medicine and how tiny your scar is!
Still praying for the sore back and that you heal fast. I can’t imagine the up and down all the time, since you can’t sit/stand/lay for long periods.
Feel better dearie!
I’m glad you are okay. Wishing you a fast recovery!
16It is too bad that more surgery is in the cards, but yay for hope of less pain soon.
And I say that you look great without makeup, though you might want to re-consider the green cap and hospital gown.
17Heal fast, and try to think positively. I work in a hospital as a PT and see loads of back surgeries every day….it really does get better. Love the aqua guard for showers….such a great idea, right? Hang in there!
18*crosses fingers for you* even if this surgery works, i suppose you could still look at it positively (should you want to, haha) because you found out that you have a more severe problem than originally thought, so you can now take actions to take better care of your back, plan future surgeries, etc.
19i meant doesn’t work, not works
20I’m terrified of needles too! And I love Dashboard Confessional! Finding your blog was meant to be
Feel better soon!
21“I knew I wouldn’t actually die, and he knew that too, but it’s always a possibility when you have surgery, you know? I’m a fan of facing reality head on.”
My favorite part of this whole post! LOL.
22Hope you are feeling much better. love the “crackberry” very funny!
23I hope you are feeling better. The pictures when your cheek felt swollen are hilarious. I was seriously laughing out loud!
24You are such a cute surgery patient! I’m sure TH was happy to see your face, no matter what expressions or numb cheeks you had going on… Get well soon!!
25You are the cutest patient ever! I hope you are pain-free soon!
26Hi i just had a discectomy and mine has healed very well but has swollen, did your incision point swell at all? Flyin123@live.co.uk
27I’m having my discectomy in 3 days. I was pretty nervous until I stumbled across your blog. Thanks so much for the great pictures and hilarious blogging!
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