I’ve recently decided to alter the way That Wife Book Club works a little bit, as I’m having a hard time keeping up with the 1 book/month goal and I know some of you are as well. And thus, Book Club will become a place for you to talk back and forth with me as I read through… whatever it is that I’m currently working on. Jenna Cole, That Wife, homemaking, and the baby keep me busy enough that I don’t read nearly as much as I’d like, and I would like to put this a little farther down my to-do list, at least for now.
And so, the Book Club link in my sidebar that you see to the right will now take you to a post like this one, where you will be able to see what I’m currently working through. You can join me if you’d like, and if you comment on the book I’ll certainly write back and share my thoughts as well.
Right now I’m working through Our Babies, Ourselves. Please share your thoughts below if you’ve read it as well!
May 17th, 2011 on 9:42 pm
I finished reading this book a month or two ago. I liked it, but it’s a bit dry and academic. The one thing I took away from it is how much our culture determines what’s “normal” or “best” - rather than real science or evidence. This is a good thing to keep in mind when reading more mainstream parenting books that all claim to know the best way to raise a child. For example, I loved how she talked about the African women who think it sounds horribly cruel to leave a tiny baby alone to sleep in a dark, quiet room. I agree! Also, I’ve always thought of co-sleeping as a bit crunchy-granola, but she presents several arguments that suggest that human babies likely evolved to sleep with their parents. All in all, the book makes some interesting points if you’re willing to stick with it.
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May 19th, 2011 on 1:01 pm
I found that the parenting methods that make the most biological and evolutionary sense according to her research are the ones I turn to intuitively for my baby. (We’re only a month in, but so happy so far!) I makes sense to wear baby, and sleep together, and feed him when he’s hungry.
One major theme of the book seemed to be that we should be turning more to older generations for wisdom and advice rather than looking to experts to fill in the blanks for us. That seemed so sweet and “the way it should be” when I finished the book a month before my baby was born. Now, having heard repeated suggestions from my family, my husband’s family and random elderly people in stores at church etc, I realize that the older generations can be just as full of crap as the rest of us. Just because someone with great grandchildren thinks you should give babies bottles of water, spank them for crying too much after the first couple months, tape a coin over their belly button, give them a little bourbon, doesn’t mean it’s sound advice morally, biologically, or any other way.
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July 14th, 2011 on 8:11 pm
First off- Hi Jenna! I’ve been a mega-lurker but this book club idea totally brought me out of the woodwork! : ) I’m new to the blogging stuff so I will try to be more social from now on! PS, you rock!!
Secondly, thank you SO much for recommending this book. I am so glad I read it! I’m not a mama, but have been married for a year, so parenting is sort of lingering there in the near future and I wanted to get a head start on some reading material. When I learned what complex little creatures newborns actually are, I was glad I started now!!!! : )
I agree with Jenn that the beginning was a little academic-y and dry, but when it got started with the actual baby stuff I thought it was fascinating. I guess this is obvious when you think about it, but the main take-away that I’ll remember is how despite the creation of a bazillion cultures around the world, humans are biologically identical to our ancestors from a million years ago. Ergo, babies are the rawest form of that.
Up until reading this I never really thought twice about sticking a baby in a swing, or stroller, or in a nursery. Now I definitely have a better perspective and am sold on baby closeness!
The one thing I am still struggling with is the co-sleeping idea. Can any actual moms weigh in on this? I totally get the reasons behind it now, (aside from the convenience thing), but I STILL have this fear that I would roll over and smoosh the baby, push them off bed, or any number of other disaster scenarios. Help?
Oh, also I have to say this book sort of freaked me out and planted the seeds for total mom guilt. If you have a baby that is fussy all the time, it’s apparently because they are unhappy with their “caretaking package”? Ha! Yikes!!
Anyway, not sure how insightful this was. Sorry. Looking forward to the next assignment!! : )
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