4 Months

Nicknames: Mah-ree-ree, Fuzzy Lumpkin, Sweetie Pie, Lovey
Temperament: Predictable and delightful.
Thing(s) I Could Do Without: You are transitioning between eating 4 ounces at a time to 6 ounces at a time, and I never know how much you’re going to need or want at a particular feeding. You’re my hungry hungry hippo!
Thing(s) You Could Do Without: Your brother getting in your face and screaming like lion/bear/banshee.
Item/Toy We Love The Most: The Bjorn babysitter bouncer.
Item/Toy You Love The Most: When we dress you in separates you love to be able to bring your shirt up to your mouth and devour it.
Things I’m Loving Most Right Now: Like your brother, you seem to prefer two longer naps instead of three shorter ones.
Things You’re Loving Most Right Now: Flirting with the pretty bald baby you see in the mirror.

First photo: Brother’s leg warmers and onesie
Second photo: Mama’s
Third photo: Brother’s onesie and pants, pants are Polish (gift from Aunt Zu)
Fourth photo: Mama’s dress

M,

We went to the park to watch your brother play and you sat in my lap, smiling and even laughing as the other kids ran by. You’re very interested in everything going on around you, and are always happy to have someone look your way and give you some attention. Now when I have you on my shoulder and hold you up to the mirror your face lights up as you see your reflection and think you’ve found a new friend to engage with.

Your brother says your name in the funniest way, something like mBah-ree. Neither of us can duplicate it exactly. He likes to get right in your face and shout very loudly, and sometimes he pushes the boundaries of what’s okay and pushes your boundaries up and down rather violently to try to get our attention. He loves you so much though, and it is a joy to watch you interact with each other. I’ve frequently heard that people have children close together to try to create strong sibling bonds (even though it is incredibly difficult to handle two little people at once) and I am left hoping that your 3-year age difference along with your difference in gender won’t prevent you from being close friends who use technology that hasn’t even been invented yet to talk about their crazy mom.

You’ve been rolling over more often, from front to back, and once or twice from back to front. You also love to pull the bottom of your dress up to your face and have a little snack. I was thinking that your brother never did that, and then I realized that’s because he never wore dresses. He missed out.

My favorite development this month was when we set you in the Bumbo-style chair for the first time. It has a white cap that goes between the portion on your legs, and whenever we set you in front of that white cap you put all of your effort into getting it off the chair and away from you. It’s amazing to see a baby so young be so determined! It makes me wonder if you will be good at puzzles? I really like puzzles and would love to sit down and put together a jigsaw puzzle with you.

For now though, let’s work on the ability to hold your own bottle. Okay?

Love,

Mama

Step 1: Set up photo spot

Step 2: Add in sibling

Step 3: Previously uninterested child exhibits a desire to be included

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3 Months

Nicknames: Mah-ree-ree, Fuzzy Lumpkin, Sweetie Pie, Principessa, Lovey, Chubba Wubba Bubba
Temperament: Every so often you have a rough day as you grow, but otherwise you are babbling and content 95% of the time that you are awake.
Thing(s) I Could Do Without: You want to nap at 5pm and stay up late into the night with me. I crave my alone time late in the evening and do everything I can to get you sleeping again.
Thing(s) You Could Do Without: You rarely get to nap and relax in the same place. Being the second child means we’re often out and about, and you sleep where and when you can.
Item/Toy We Love The Most: Dressing you in mama’s baby outfits.
Item/Toy You Love The Most: Anything we set on your chest that you can bring up to your mouth and gum on.
Things I’m Loving Most Right Now: You started laughing! You are so fascinated by the world around you, and when we walk around I see you trying to take it all in. You wake up kicking and cooing and happy. The moments at night when brother is in bed and I get to drink you in.
Things You’re Loving Most Right Now: Peek-a-boo, talking, when I put your arms through your sleeves or take them out again.

M,

You are wearing 6 month sized clothing already. How did that happen? Read more →

Twice I have endured the slow, stretching, sleepless, process we call pregnancy. Twice I have planned, prepared, hoped, dared. Twice I have given birth. Twice I have been able to look back and say “I got everything I wanted.” I am grateful to be able to say that, because I know how lucky I am.

Below is my retelling of the birth of my daughter. I type it as she grunts and wiggles in my lap, the joyful result of the story I’m about to tell. During my pregnancies I longed to hear the birth stories of the women in my family. I don’t want to wait until my daughter is blooming with a little life of her own to tell this story, to trust my faulty memory to truly communicate how transcendent the experience was for me. Even now my written word can’t do it justice. My heart is full.

I listened to far too many women say their second, third, fourth, etc, babies came “sooner” and I thought that meant that I would deliver at an earlier gestational date than I did with T1. He came at 40 weeks 2 days, and I was convinced that I would be delivering before the 10 month mark. My mom came down, I had everything prepped and ready to go, and we waited. And waited. And waited.

On the night before my due date, February 1st, I was convinced that this would be my last night without a baby in my arms. I lost my mucous plug that day, my due date. The 1st was a Friday, the weekend of the Superbowl, and it felt like time had stopped. I was bored, anxious, tired, sick, swollen, and ready. What was baby waiting for? On the night of the 5th my mom told me “My nurse friend said that if you really want to get this baby out, try the same method that you used to get it inside of you. And lift up your hips at the end to help the sperm get to your cervix.” I would have tried anything recommended by a medical professional at that point, and so we did… it.

Two hours later, just after 12:00am on the 6th of February, I woke up to a pop. 40 weeks, 5 days. My water didn’t break with T1 (the midwife did it manually when I was around 8 cm), and I had really wanted to experience labor initiating with the breaking of the bag of waters. Even though I had read many, many birth stories where women described what it was like to have your water break spontaneously, and even though I had huge amounts of fluid gushing out of me every time I moved, I still called our midwife and said “I’m pretty sure that my water just broke. I don’t think I’m peeing my pants? The fluid is clear. I’m probably in labor.” She told me to go back to bed and get some sleep if I could. We cleaned up the bed (easy to do, I’d been sleeping on a shower curtain for weeks!) and I tried to go back to sleep. I had learned my lesson with my first birth, that even though I was uncomfortable and sore and excited, there is never enough sleep to be had right before a baby comes.

Contractions started shortly after I climbed into bed, 5 minute apart, and I could tell things were moving along fast enough that sleep wasn’t an option. That Husband rolled over and offered to help me, but I told him go to back to sleep. Before things got really hard I wanted some time to myself. I went down to the kitchen and tried to eat and drink, thinking I might have a 12+ hour labor like last time. I paced the floor, practiced breathing through the contractions, pushed my backside against the fridge to try to relieve some of the pain in my back, drank water, ate a banana, and played Candy Crush. I hated sitting with T1′s labor, but this time it felt so good to labor on the toilet. There’s something so wonderful about being able to completely relax your bottom half when you’re contracting.

At 3:30am I called my doula, Jen, and asked her advice. I told her contractions were 30 seconds long, about 2 minutes apart while walking around. I initially told her to go back to sleep and that I wouldn’t need her until the sun was up, but less than 2 hours later I called her and told her to come help me. I hadn’t been sure that a doula was really necessary for me, as I knew That Husband would be home, and it felt silly to have so many people present at my birth (husband, mother, doula, midwife, midwife’s assistant, photographer) but I’m so glad I decided to hire Jen. She was so flexible, willing to do whatever I asked, and told me she would come at any time, no matter how early it was in my labor, if that’s what I needed.

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2 Months

Nicknames: Mah-ree-ree, Fuzzy Lumpkin, Sweetie Pie, Principessa*
Temperament: We’ve had a few rough days here and there, one evening where we walked out of the house with you screaming in the babysitter’s arms. Overall you’re still a really happy and content baby.
Thing(s) I Could Do Without: You wake for the day between 6:30-7:00am. Your brother loved to sleep in and I miss that.
Thing(s) You Could Do Without: Your brother patting your belly a bit violently in an attempt to calm you down, bedtime (juggling both kids by myself means you are often crying as I try to get your brother to bed).
Item/Toy We Love The Most: The swing.
Item/Toy You Love The Most: Your fists. Initially when you sucked on them it meant you were hungry. Now I can’t always tell why you are sucking on them so greedily.
Things I’m Loving Most Right Now: Your smiles. Most of the time you won’t look right into my eyes, preferring to look around the room and take everything in. But there are times when you will look right at me and smile so big.
Things You’re Loving Most Right Now: When I hold you on my chest and pat your back. This is the best way to put you to sleep.

M,

I wanted one of your weekly pictures to be in one of my newborn outfits, but I waited a bit too long to make it happen. You’re growing so big so fast! Everything except your hair. I admit I grew up dreaming of a girl with thick dark hair like I had at birth, but you’ve convinced me that bald baby girls have their charms as well.

My favorite thing about you at this stage? Your smiles up at daddy. When he comes home on the weekends you can’t stop beaming. “Daddy’s Girl” is a cliche, but I understand why everyone uses it. You adore him (and he adores you in return).

I hate to be the stereotypical mother, but the month passed by far too quickly. I don’t want you to stop growing (we have so many exciting things ahead of us!) but I am kicking myself for not taking more pictures and recording more videos. I can’t slow time down, but I can preserve who you are at this very moment so you can look back someday and see what a sweetheart you were. Actually, you’ll see what a sweetheart you are. Because I’ve got a feeling you’re always going to be that way.

Love,

Mama

*I find this so hard to resist, it’s as though I’m conditioned to call you princess. I dislike the “entitled princess culture” in America though, so I’m going to try to stop (eventually). For now I’ll delude myself into thinking using the Italian form of princess somehow makes a difference.